Trick James - Suicide Letter 2

Bitch I'm almost 21, I thought I would be famous by now
But I'm poppin pills and crying in my basement right now (well fuck it)
I hate myself, I hate my life, I wanna end my life
And if I die today I hope my momma know it's out of spite
Kept my niggas close, I used to keep this bitches closer
But these bitches broke my heart
My heart is cold just like my shoulder

All I wanted was your love, you left me standing in the rain
It's been a year, you're still the same
You live your live without no shame
Bitch I fucking hate you, and I hope you know that
I'm in a drop-top bumpin grumpy ville, yeah that's that throwback
Til' I get my bro back

And if I ever I'd never come back
Cause all these bitches fucking shady, everybody every baby
Had to cut the lean and pills cause all it did was made me lazy
Put my sidechick in the back because my glocky riding shawty
Pray my ex is of by herself couldn't see her with somebody yeah

I did 60 in the freeway just to get to your house
And you ain't even had no bed, we had to sleep on your couch
Can't belive you'd ever told me we'd be better as friends
'Cause I'd go to hell and back for you and do it again

Spent 300 on some shoes so I could feel like somebody
But I'm still riding by myself cause I dont fuck with nobody
And now I'm thinking and drinking
You let me fall of the deep end and now I guess
It's all fucking sad that me and vicitor ain't fucking speaking

Tables turn and bridges burn, you live your life and you learn
I slit my wrist and pray to God that one day you'll return
I know you're sick of me crying, I know you're sick of me trying
You know I'm smiling on the outside but my insides is dying
Love is where in life it changing, nothing lasts, people change

You hate youself I hate you too, so deep inside we're the same
But if I die, I pray to God, you'll remember my name
I'm of the drugs, I'm speeding fast, I'm tryna stay in my lane
I can't belive I ever try to write a suicide letter, it's been a year
I'm still the same and I ain't doin' much better
But I can't help how I'm feeling, I'm tryna deal with my feelings
So all I do is get depressed and sit and stare at the ceiling

Oh my God, my life is over, what the fuck ima do
She used to tell me that she love me and I thought it was true
You know I want to kill myself, I know you don't know what to do
But I can't even hurt myself cause I'd worry about you
That's what I'm talking about